


with a theme song of green and failures

by whywouldieverpushlouisoffthebed



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Hand Jobs, M/M, harry is captain cupcake, louis is a bank robber but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-03
Updated: 2013-05-03
Packaged: 2017-12-10 08:07:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/783757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whywouldieverpushlouisoffthebed/pseuds/whywouldieverpushlouisoffthebed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis blames his failed bank robbery on the teller with the curly brown hair and green eyes. His name is Harry, he learns, and Harry seems a lot like one of those people that change lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	with a theme song of green and failures

Google maps said it would take him approximately five minutes and eighteen seconds to get from his apartment to his local bank and the more he thought about it the more he realized he wasn’t all that prepared. His first hint had been when he woke up that morning, after hitting snooze on his phone several times, and couldn’t find a black hoodie. Everyone had a black hoodie, it was like a fashion requirement, which was exactly why when he went out and bought a black ski mask and a water gun and some black spray paint he didn’t buy one.

 “Shit. Fuck. Good job Louis.”

 The boy paced back and forth across the five or six feet that he called a living room, muttering to himself because there was no one else around to express his frustration to.

 “Who doesn’t own a black hoodie? Seriously.”

 He proceeded to his closet where he started ripping clothes out, tossing them across the floor as he went. Bright reds and yellows and stripes after stripes after stripes. That's why he didn’t own a black hoodie. He must've momentarily forgotten that he was Louis Tomlinson. And he was gay. This whole thing was actually kind of ironic when he thought about it, because he was always so cheerful and friendly and sunny. He should've formulated a plan to dress up like a flower and walk around the park telling people jokes and getting kisses from cute puppies, that was more his style, not robbing a bank.

 Robbing a bank, that was something he was going to do. In real life. Today. In less then thirty minutes to be exact. Well if he could get himself together that is.

 After emptying his entire closet he trudged across the mountains of fabric and fell face forward onto his bed.

 “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”

 He groaned and scrubbed at his eyes furiously, trying to bring some life to them. His brain could use some too.

 Because obviously it wasn’t a good idea to rob a bank. Who in their right mind would think that.

 Louis did.

 Or he wasn’t in his right mind.

 One or the other.

 His phone started playing some annoying ring tone he had set specifically to be able to wake him up. It didn’t always work. But he didn’t always want to wake up.

 “Oh will you shut the fuck up!”

 He snatched the phone up and hurled it across the room where it hit the corner of his door with a thud and fell to the ground.

 After a couple minutes he got up to retrieve it and of course it wouldn’t turn back on. That must've been his second hint. No his third. The hoodie was his second.

 That particular alarm had been alerting him he had five minutes before he needed to leave. He stuffed his supplies into his Courage the Cowardly Dog backpack, threw on a yellow hoodie with a big smiley face painted in the middle, and crammed his broken phone into his pocket.

 At least he didn’t look like a bank robber. Maybe that would work out to his advantage. It didn’t.

 It took him seven minutes to get to the bank. Stupid fucking Google and its inaccuracies. The time difference couldn’t possibly have had anything to do with the fact that he was shaking like a leaf and drove five miles under the speed limit so he wouldn’t crash and die. Because that would defeat the entire purpose now wouldn’t it?

 He blasted Taylor Swift the entire ride, not because he liked her or anything, actually the complete opposite. She had always gotten on his nerves with her upbeat songs about how she hated every girl that got within thirty feet of her crush and wanted to crash weddings because no one elses feelings mattered. What kind of person crashes a wedding? Taylor Swift that's who. Although he would consider crashing a wedding, only he better have a damn good reason, like a boyfriend who got in a car accident and lost his memory and was marrying someone other than him. That's a fucking brilliant reason. Top that Taylor.

 So his impeccable logic decided that listening to music he hated (and illegally downloaded out of pure spite) would get him in the right mindset for what he was about to do. He needed to be angry. He needed to feel powerful. Maybe he would post on twitter that Taylor Swift helped him rob a bank. No. What was he thinking. You can't just go around bragging about things like that. He didn’t want to go to jail after all. He was too pretty for jail. Or at least that's what he’d been told before.

 “Should've said no” finished its last note as he pulled into a parking space. And that was his fourth hint.

 He probably should've put on his mask before he was under the watchful eyes of the surveillance cameras positioned at each corner of the doors but there really wasn’t any turning back now. He hadn’t really anticipated the cameras, his research was lacking altogether to be quite honest, but in his defense he had been rather busy lately. And this had been kind of a last minute plan.

 So he pulled the mask over his head and threw his backpack over his shoulder and fuck this was really happening.

 Luckily no one was outside, every space unoccupied but his own and one of the reserved employee spots. Maybe this wasn’t going to end in failure after all. Louis was going to pull this off.

 When he pulled open the heavy glass door that had to have just been cleaned, a little bell rung and he might've jumped a foot in the air. Realizing it wasn’t an alarm and police weren’t tackling him, yet, he straightened up and passed through a second set of doors. Did they always have two sets of doors? These are things that would’ve been important to know.

 The place was deserted. Desks that usually were home to women with massive hair and too much makeup, sat vacant in the early morning glow coming through the windows. There was music playing over the speakers, something by The Fray, and fuck he liked The Fray. Didn’t whoever picked the music selection know he was coming and that this was exactly what he didn’t need.

 He must've completely forgotten that he was wearing a ski mask and that wasn’t normal attire for public appearances because he strolled across the dull maroon carpet like he was simply there to make a deposit. He didn’t see anyone at the counter yet. In fact he didn’t see anyone anywhere.

 There was one of those little silver bell things sitting next to a sign that informed everyone (or no one) that that particular counter was closed. He decided to tap it a couple of times, little dings ringing out through the empty space like gun shots in the woods. He was already breaking all the rules anyway.

 “Coming!”

 A deep voice floated out from somewhere, accompanied by some rustling and a rather loud mumbled “fuck”.

 Louis hadn’t been expecting his opponent to be a man.

 A door swung open at the far end of the counter and out stepped (or stumbled, kind of like a baby deer, yeah that's exactly what he looked like, a baby deer) a boy who couldn’t have been older than twenty.

 Louis hoped his mask hid the fact that he scanned the boy up and down, brown hair that was a curly mess, big wide eyes, perfect lips, long torso, long limbs, long long long. He wondered what else might've been long but then remembered he was here to do business and business wasn’t this boy no matter how much he might've wished it was.

 “Can I help you sir?”

 And he asked just like Louis was an old lady in a flower dress with her reading glasses on a necklace and walker in her hands.

 What do you even say to that?

 “Yeah actually. I need all the money.”

 That's what they always said in the movies right? No. Shit. Fuck.

 “I mean—I mean give me all the money.”

 At this point a slightly confused smile wandered onto the boy's face but he didn’t seem at all phased.

 “Did you fill out a withdrawal slip sir? I'll need that to get your money for you.”

 Either this kid was an idiot or just thought he was really clever. He was lucky Louis wasn’t a real bank robber because he would’ve shot him by now.

 “I don’t have an account.”

 Louis was fumbling to pull the spray painted water gun from his backpack without looking obvious.

 “Oh I used to love that show!”

 The boy practically screamed when he spotted the backpack, and it took Louis a second to catch up.

 “Did you see the episode with—“

 Louis caught himself mid sentence because he wasn’t here to discuss old shows he watched growing up. Even if those shows were spectacular. He was here to put his water gun to this adorable boy's temple and demand he take him to the vault so he could pack stacks of money into his backpack and escape before there was a need for actual violence. Because Louis didn’t do actual violence.

 “Why are you wearing a mask by the way? Are you here to rob me? I'm Harry, they told me I'm always s'posed to introduce myself because “It gives our guests the personal relationship they desire” or some shit. Opps forget I said that. That's not professional at all.”

 All Louis could think was he'd take a personal relationship with Harry, full of drawn out syllables and that raspy voice and a mouth that moved just right when he spoke.

 “Yes,” was all he managed to get out but Harry seemed to understand.

 “Can't exactly just let you rob the place—um I don’t think I caught your name.”

 Harry paused waiting for Louis to introduce himself like this was a completely normal situation.

 “Cant just go round giving my name out when I'm about to be a wanted criminal now can I?”

 The sheer ridiculous of the entire morning's events hit Louis in the face and he started to laugh. A real laugh that left his face red and chest heaving, a kind of laugh he hadn’t experienced in a very long time.

 “What if I refuse to take you to the money? Then you’ll have to leave and there wont be any reason to get the police involved.”

 Harry was still standing there behind that counter like he thought he was some kind of bank robber psychiatrist. Louis would show him.

 “I guess I'd have to shoot you then.”

 He lifted the gun and watched Harry's eyes get just a little bit wider before they returned to normal.

 “You wouldn’t.”

 “I would. That's why I brought it and all.”

 Harry was looking right into Louis' eyes now and with the rest of his body hidden he felt quite violated.

 “You're eyes are pretty. They’re blue like the walls in my bedroom,  Ocean Blue, I think that's what it was called. Speaking of oceans, you’re eyes are kind of like the ocean, I want to swim in them. Is that weird?”

 And yes it was weird. None of this was making any sense, causing Louis to forget his entire plan that he wasn’t even sure he had to begin with. But at the same time his heart started beating just a little bit faster and he was sure his face was flushed a light pink. At least something good came out of that mask he thought to himself, and smiled.

 “It's weird.”

 He answered, but he was still smiling.

 “Sorry mate. I think it's the mask, got me all flustered because I keep imaging you shooting me. Even if you just have a water gun spray painted black.”

 This kid was ridiculous, making fun of all of Louis' hard work and wanting to swim in his eyes. Who the fuck did he think he was?

 “Who the fuck do you think you are?”

 And the smile was gone. Kind of.

 “I already told you. I'm Harry. Harry Styles. Bank teller by day and cupcake maker by night. I have a cape with a cupcake on the back and it says Captain Cupcake. Isn’t that neat?”

 The smile was back.

 “Very neat Harry. Now we have important matters to discuss, like you going back to the vault and getting me all the money.”

 Suddenly his face lit up and Louis was afraid he might spontaneously combust right there in front of him. That would be problematic in more ways then one.

 “You have to take your mask off.”

 Harry demanded smugly.

 “What?”

 If Louis wouldn’t have been wearing said mask he was pretty sure his chin would’ve hit the ground.

 “And I wanna know your name.”

 And there really was no choice left but to do as he was told.

 “I'm Louis.”

 And he'd never been more nervous to introduce himself in his life.

 “Louhhie. I like it. Now off with that!”

 Harry reaches a hand across the counter and taps where he assumes Louis' forehead was.

 Slowly, mainly because his brain is fuzzy and he doesn’t trust himself to know where his head is, Louis reaches up and finds the fabric he was looking for. It comes off easily and he's sure his hair is sticking up in every direction, but he reminds himself that he's robbing a bank, not modeling.

 He hears Harry's breath hitch and he can't really wrap his head around why it happened.

 “You have a really stunning face for a bank robber.”

 How many bank robberies has Harry been through? That would explain why he's so calm.

 “How many bank robberies have you been through?”

 “This is my first one! Exciting right? I haven’t personally met any before you but I've seen their pictures on the news and they are all old and crusty and creepy looking. You're like young and clean and not creepy in the least. It's confusing.”

 Louis is torn between walking out right now or jumping over the counter and kissing Harry until he doesn’t care about the money anymore.

 “Thanks?”

 And it's more of a question than anything else, because as far as he's knows there’s no appropriate response for being told you don’t look like a bank robber.

 “Oh you’re welcome. Let me go get you that money like I promised.”

 Just like that Harry disappears through the door and doesn’t come back for five minutes. Louis counted. He was almost just maybe about to leave because the boy probably took off out a back door, when Harry reemerged with a duffel bag and a smile.

 “I thought you ran away.”

 Well that wasn’t supposed to come out.

 “I'd never run away from you Louis. You're too pretty. Here's your money. Have a nice day and come back to see us soon.”

 It was so rehearsed Louis almost threw up in his mouth and died from Harry's effort at professionalism.

 “You’re seriously just giving it to me?”

 This must've been a trick. He would take the duffel bag and walk out those doors to a parking lot of police cars and flashing lights and guns all pointed with their fancy lasers at his face. But would Harry really do that? Because he said Louis was pretty which surely meant he wouldn’t want him to get mangled from bullet wounds.

 “I'm seriously just giving it to you. Now get that cute little butt out of here before someone else comes in and wonders what the hell is going on.”

 Harry's looking at him like he is a fucking star in the middle of a black sky and that wouldn’t be possible if he was lying. Would it?

 “Tha—thanks.”

 They stand there for a couple more seconds, just staring, and Louis isn’t sure why but he really wants to get a bank account here. Maybe so he has an excuse to come see the boy with the curly hair and dimples. Yes dimples. He needs to put _Get a bank account_ at the top of his list when he gets home.

 “You’re welcome mate.”

 He thinks Harry might be feeling the same thing and ask him if he wants to make an account right now, but he doesn’t. He did just willingly allow someone to rob his workplace after all, so making that person a bank account in the very same day might not be the smartest course of action.

 He's almost out the door when he decides to turn around. Harry hasn’t moved. He's still staring.

 “You know you’re a pretty awesome teller. I'll have to send this place an email about how helpful and professional you are.”

 Funny thing was he said that before he even knew if Harry had called the police or not, and he was serious.

 Funnier thing was there weren’t any police in the parking lot. There weren’t any police down the street. There weren’t any police hiding on top of buildings waiting to snipe him down. He drove home and sung “I knew you were trouble” with a grin.

 *

 When he dumps the contents of the duffel bag out in the middle of his living room he was expecting a lot more green. What he gets is white white white. He should've known.

 He takes a kick at the stacks and stacks of plain computer paper which sends pieces flying across the floor. That's when he sees the money. He doesn’t even know how he spotted the little green corner sticking out but he did, bending down to push all the paper off top of it. It's not much, about the amount of his weekly paycheck, and he wants to scream. Harry must've thought he was so smart planning out this sneaky little scene. What good was this measly amount of money going to do him when his rent was due tomorrow and his electric was getting shut off in less than a week and he hadn’t ate a proper meal in three days. No good, that's what.

 It's not until he's calmed down and hung back up all the clothes in his bedroom that he makes his way into the living room again. He's just about scooped every piece of paper into an already overstuffed trash bag when something catches his eye. One of the papers is written on and sure it could just be something that got printed out or mixed in but Louis picks it up anyway. He should probably thank god that he did.

  _Dear Louis the bank robber,_

  _I failed to mention that I haven’t really worked at this bank long enough to be trusted with a key to the vault. My manager was running late which was why I was there by myself. I wasn’t even supposed to unlock the doors until she got there but what can I say, I felt like being a rebel. Oh and sorry about all the paper. I had to get you out of there somehow before she got there and called the police. You're too pretty for jail. I gave you all the money I had in my wallet but I wish I would’ve had more. Maybe next time haha. So this is probably a long shot and I fully expect to never hear from you again given the circumstances but I'll give you my number anyway. Because I've never been robbed before and I didn’t even get a picture of you for my scrapbook (yes I have a scrapbook, stop laughing)._

  _Harry xx_

 And clear as day there was his number scrawled out beneath his name. Fuck fuck fuck. Louis needed a good nap. It wasn’t even nine yet and he desperately needed to go back to sleep and possibly never get up. Yeah that sounded good.

 *

 Naps really do work wonders because when Louis woke up he decided he would call Harry. Because there really was no logical reason he could come up with to not call Harry.

 Sure the boy was a little odd, but it was refreshing. He was witty and far too nice and smiled too much but Louis needed someone to bring a little bit of life back into his existence.

 Then he remembered he had broken his phone. He really should start being more careful.

 *

 Two days later he had managed to convince the burly man at the store to exchange his phone and yeah maybe he flirted a little more than necessary, but hey you gotta do what you gotta do. And he had to call his favorite bank teller.

 Harry picked up on the second ring.

 “Hello?”

 His voice was exactly how Louis remembered it. Fuck what was he talking about, he barely knew the boy.

 “Hey um hi Harry. It's Louis.”

 He probably wouldn’t even remember him. That was exactly his luck.

 “Hopefully you’re not calling for more money because I can't help you there.”

 And Harry laughed because he wasn’t being rude, not even a tiny bit.

 “I'm not. I promise. I guess I just wanted to say thank you. Ya know? For the money.”

 Louis was stumbling over his words and his feet as he walked down the street back to his crummy apartment, because yes he called Harry as soon as he had the working phone in his possession. He owed him that much really. Or at least that's what he told himself.

 “Wanna know how you can make it up to me?”

 He could feel Harry smiling through the phone if that was even possible.

 “How?”

 He wondered if Harry could feel it too.

 “Go on a date with me? Please.”

 He told himself he said yes because Harry was polite but the only one he was fooling was himself.

 “Yeah. Yeah I think I can do that.”

 Harry audibly exhaled and let out a sigh.

 “I thought you were going to say no.”

 He admitted, and he sounded like a scared little kid, because he was. And shit what was Louis getting himself into. He was twenty four years old with no friends and no family and an apartment that was falling apart and a stupid job that would never pay enough.

 “How old are you Harry?”

 Because he didn’t have to know but he did.

 “I’m twenty. Why Lou?”

 And _oh_ apparently they were on a nickname level now and Harry was only twenty but for some reason he didn’t really care all that much anymore.

 “Well cause I might be a bank robber but I’m not a kidnapper.”

 Louis didn’t think it was that funny, he even shamed himself silently for being so lame, but Harry laughed and that was all that mattered.

 “You can kidnap me anytime you want. So how about this date?”

 “I don’t really have any money Harry.”

 “S'okay, I can get it. But there’s one condition.”

 There seemed to always be conditions with this boy but if that was the price Louis had to pay he was sure he'd survive.

“What's that?”

 Silence.

 “I want to go today.”

 “That's it? I was honestly worried. Today's fine. Today's perfect actually.”

 He was sure he sounded like a fifteen year old girl who just got asked out for the first time, but he didn’t even give a shit.

 *

 Harry said he'd pick him up at seven which left him exactly five hours to get ready.

 It took him five hours to get ready. He hadn’t been on a date in a very long time.

 *

 “I haven't been on a date in awhile.”

 He mumbled as quietly as he could, wringing his hands together as he sat next to Harry in the car.

 “I went on one last week. My mate Niall set me up with this guy. And he doesn’t really have the best taste a majority of the time because he's only into girls, but he really did try so I had to be nice and give it a shot.”

 It was strange to have an actual conversation with someone other than the customers that came into his work.

 “Details I need details. What happened?”

 Louis was interested and that was a rare thing.

 But he seemed to be interested in everything Harry said and he wasn’t quite sure what that meant.

 “Well we went to some expensive restaurant and ate and it was boring with a capital B. Did I mention his name was Stephano, because it was, like who the fuck even has a name like that?”

 “I don’t know.”

 “But needless to say it was a massive waste of time and I won't be listening to Niall anymore.”

 “Sounds like a smart decision. I hope I'm not a waste of time.”

 It's not like he wanted to say it and more like it just kind of escaped him involuntarily.

 “Never.”

 Harry's eyes were twinkling and he would’ve been stupid not to believe him.

 *

 They went to see a movie and of course Harry paid for everything, popcorn and all. Louis tried convincing him to get the smallest size but that just wouldn’t do because,

 “We're growing boys Louis and we need to eat everything we can now, while our metabolisms are high you see, because one day just looking at food will make us fat.”

 The reasoning was hard to argue with so Louis asked for extra butter and a chocolate bar, which Harry seemed thrilled about.

 The movie was good but when Harry reached across the armrest and threaded his fingers with Louis', that was all he could think about from that point on. They sat there all warm bodies and tingling fingers and quick glances until the credits started rolling. Louis might not have been on a lot of dates but he knew what was coming. It was inevitable. Or maybe not.

 Because Harry didn’t kiss him in the dark theater with romantic music playing on screen in front of them. And he didn’t kiss him when they sat in the car outside of Louis' apartment. Then they both got out and Harry walked him to the front steps, and all that managed to cycle through Louis' brain was _this is it this is it_. But it wasn’t. There was a hug and suddenly warm lips found his cheek and Louis wasn’t sure why but it was the best first date kiss he’d ever gotten.

 *

 There was a second date because Louis found it physically impossible to say no to Harry. And he was starting to think he might be possessed by a demon that wanted to turn over control of his life to curls and dimples and soft hands.

 They went bowling and Louis got a lot of gutter balls but Harry cheered for him anyway. Nachos sufficed for dinner and they ended up getting in a cheese fight that ended with a stern looking employee  giving them their second warning. The first came when Harry practically chased Louis down the lane because he forgot to kiss his bowling ball for good luck. Yeah that was Harry's idea. Of course it was.

 They drove home with the radio blaring between bursts of laughter that rang out whenever they looked at each other. Why they were laughing they weren’t really sure. It had started when Louis tried to perform an extensively planned dance move in the tiny cramped front seat, but ended up failing miserably and almost elbowing Harry in the nose. It only escalated from there. By the time they got to Louis' apartment they looked so crazy that anyone walking past probably thought they had escaped from a mental hospital.

 Harry didn’t kiss him properly that time either. It bothered Louis for awhile but when he was laying in bed that night and his phone buzzed and the screen said Harry he forgot about everything but that very moment right there.

  _From Harry: Louis!!!!!!!!!_

 It shouldn't have made him smile that much but it did.

  _Yes Harry?_

  _From Harry: Can I tell you a secret?_

  _Ohh a secret! Of course._

  _From Harry: Do you mind if I call you and tell you?_

  _Go for it._

 Then his phone was ringing and of course it was Harry.

 “Did you know this is our second phone conversation?”

 And of course that's something Harry would keep track of.

 “You’ve been keeping track?

 “Maybe I have, maybe I haven’t. You’ll never know.”

 “So this secret?”

 Louis asked, trying to steer the subject back to its original purpose. He was curious, what could he say.

 “So yeah this secret. Um—well. I'm kind of scared to kiss you.”

  _Oh._ Oh wow.

 That explained a lot but left Louis more confused than he had been in the first place.

 “Why?”

 He knew it was a stupid question but he honestly couldn’t think of any reason why someone would be afraid to kiss him. Was he really that scary?

 “I’ve never really kissed a boy before.”

 Harry sounded nervous and that was awkward because Harry never sounded nervous. He was almost robbed for gods sake and that hadn’t even phased him.

 “Lou?”

 “Yeah. Yeah sorry.”

 “Did you hear me?”

 His voice was so full of fear and Louis didn’t like it one bit. He wanted to snuggle him up under a blanket and kiss all that anxiety right out of him.

 “Come over.”

 He'd thought of crazier plans before and they all seemed to work out.

 "What? Now?”

 “Yes now. I'm hanging up. I'll see you soon.”

 Click.

 Back when Louis had friends he learned quickly that that trick worked wonders. When you don’t give someone a choice they tend to do what you want.

 He wasn’t sure how long it would take Harry to get there, or if he would show up at all, but he didn’t feel like getting out of bed so he didn’t.

 Fifteen minutes and there was a knock on the door., of course there was a knock on the door. He'd get out of bed for Harry any day.

 So he jumped up and padded into the living room, pulling the door open just enough for Harry to come through. Once it was securely closed and locked, he turned around to find Harry staring at the ground.

 He was going to change that.

 With a look of determination and extreme fondness mixed together in his eyes he found his way to Harry, his hand finding the boy's chin and gently lifting his face up to meet his. It was a soft kiss, lips just barely grazing across each other, but it caused Harry let out a deep sigh, visibly relaxing. It was Louis who pulled away first. He opened his eyes to find green already peering back at him and Harry was blinking all delicate and his eyelashes fanned out across his pale skin every couple of seconds and Louis was fucked.

 He almost said it out loud. Almost.

 Instead he chose to kiss Harry again, pulling the boy close and molding their lips together gently like they had been doing this for years.

 It didn’t take long for Harry to be Harry again.

 “This is so much fucking better than kissing girls.”

 Yep this was the Harry he knew.

 They were still kissing, standing there in the middle of Louis' messy living room, wrapped around each other. It should've been weird but it wasn’t.

 “I'm glad you think so. In fact I think kissing you is a lot better than kissing anyone.”

 Louis mumbled into Harry's mouth, before gently pulling the boy's bottom lip between his teeth.

 “I think you’re lying.”

 Harry smirked into the kiss, oh that little shit.

 “M'not. I'll prove it.”

 Louis suddenly pulled away but found Harry's hands to hold in his.

 “And how're you gonna do that?”

 Harry's eyes were all twinkly and Louis quite liked it that way. He'd have to schedule _Kiss Harry_ into his days a lot more often.

 “Have you ever had a boyfriend?”

 And Louis was stupid because of course he hadn’t.

 “Nope never. I thought the whole “I've never kissed a boy kind of gave that away.”

 Smirky little shit.

 “Would you like to be my boyfriend?”

 Louis asked, and he was sure he was grinning too much.

 “Maybe.”

 Such a little shit. But at least he was cute, and extremely endearing.

 “What can I do to get a solid yes?”

 He was pretty sure he'd do just about anything at this point.

 “I want one of those little notes. The ones that get folded up all fancy and you open it up and it says “Will you go out with me?” and there are little check boxes. If I get one of those I'd check yes. Nobody ever made me one of those before. Well except this one girl a long long time ago. But she doesn’t count because I'm pretty sure her friends dared her to do it.”

 That led to Louis digging in the trash for a piece of paper and scrawling out a note and trying his best to fold it “fancy”, whatever that was supposed to mean. He pretended to be a school girl and shyly slide it to Harry with a failed wink. Some people just don’t have the luxury of being able to wink and Louis was one of those people.

 It was all so stupid and cheesy and ridiculous but Harry lit up and unfolded it all careful like, making sure not to smooth out any of the creases. He checked off the yes box and held it up to show Louis.

 “This is going in my scrapbook.”

 He declared proudly, and folded it back exactly how Louis had it, then carefully stuck it in his pocket.

 *

 After that there was a lot of texting and even more phone calls. Sometimes when Louis didn’t have enough money to pay his phone bill Harry would randomly show up at his door or he would get home from work at the local smoothie shop to find him sitting in the hallway with a book. He wondered how long it would last because he always wondered things like that.

 *

 So far it had lasted two weeks. Louis made a little check list and hung it up in his closet so Harry couldn’t see it, because that would be embarrassing.

 Two weeks turned out to be a milestone.

 They were cuddled up on Harry's couch under a mound of blankets watching some old movie Harry had seen a hundred times. Louis was watching more of Harry than anything else, and thought it was funny because he still laughed at all the same jokes and seemed genuinely surprised when there was a turn of events.

 “You never told me why you tried to rob the bank that day.”

 Well that was random.

 “Seemed like a good idea I guess. My electric was going to get shut off and I was behind on my rent. You've seen my apartment. I'm not raking in the money like you mister bank teller.”

 Louis was just messing with him but it can out a little too harsh, so he leaned over and bit Harry's neck to lighten the mood.

 “That is Captain Cupcake to you. And I'm in no way “raking in the money”. I'm just financially stable.”

 Harry returned the gesture but ended up getting carried away, latching onto the soft skin on Louis' neck and sucking a dark bruise there.

 “Possessive are we?”

 And Harry was moving up his jawline so Louis tilted his head back to give him better access, because fuck.

 “Want everyone to know you’re mine.”

 His voice was all deep and serious and Louis wanted to do things to the mouth that voice came from so so bad.

 “Fuck. Harr—“

 He was effectively cut off by a pair of lips, bruisingly hard, against his own.

 Then he was being pushed down, Harry straddling him, and he tried to pretend he didn’t feel the hard outline of the boy's cock against his thigh. He tried really really hard.

 But there was that beating heart pressed so close to his and Harry's hands roaming up his shirt and fuck fuck fuck he really just needed someone to touch him. Particularly Harry, and definitely somewhere on the lower half of his body.

 That was the moment Louis might've just decided he believed in soul mates, because Harry's hand was  finding its way past the waistband of Louis' sweatpants and Jesus fucking Christ.

 “Weren’t expecting that were you?”

 No. no he wasn’t expecting that.

 “I—shit Harry, I thought you’d never done this before? “

 Louis felt a lot like he was floating, Harry's long fingers wrapped around him, hands clumsy from nerves, but trying their hardest to stay steady. He gave him an A for effort.

 “Haven’t.”

 Harry mumbled pressing his lips back against Louis' mouth, all red and swollen skin, glistening in the dim light of the tv.

“Pretend you're doing it to yourself. Helps with the nerves.”

 So Harry pulled his hand out of Louis' pants which earned a little whimper Louis wasn’t even sure was humanly possible. Then both his pants and boxers were on the floor and Harry was giggling like a twelve year old girl.

 “You’re really big. Oh it's so cute Louis. Can I name it?”

 This was what he had signed himself up for and surprisingly he liked it.

 “You can name it whatever you want once you get your hands back on it.”

 Quicker then he could blink, Harry had spit on his hands and those hands on Louis' cock and he wasn’t going to last long at all.

 It was unlike any hand job he'd ever had in his life mainly because it felt like Harry was everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. He was kissing Louis' neck and his lips and sucking bruises onto his chest, all the while his hand never leaving where Louis wanted it most. And Louis hadn’t had a hand job since he was in high school but fuck he wouldn’t mind doing this more often.

 It was actually embarrassing just how quickly he came, hot and sticky in Harry's hand, moaning that name over and over into its owners mouth.

 “That was fun. Like really fun. Can we do it again?”

 He'd only just finished and Harry was looking at him like he'd just won a stuffed animal out of a claw machine.

 He really liked Harry. And there was that twinkle again.

 If he forgot to mark the days on his check list after that it was only that, he forgot, it didn’t have anything to do with the fact that he might've decided he didn’t want to worry about the end anymore.

 *

 If two weeks was a milestone, a month was whatever was more monumental than that.

 And if the hand jobs had been amazing, the blow jobs blew him away. He told Harry that exact joke and it made him laugh so hard he ended up crying. Harry always laughed at his jokes. He really really liked Harry.

 Because Harry was always there, doing whatever Louis needed him to do, without ever needing to be told.

 There was the night Louis got sick and Harry was so utterly cliche, bringing chicken noodle soup and tucking Louis all cozy beneath the blankets, reading to him until he feel asleep. Then came the day Louis cried for absolutely no reason, “I'm just sad” he had sobbed into Harry's shirt, and Harry just rubbed his back and told him everything would be okay. And it would, because they were together. And sometimes when Louis felt like Harry was too good for him and Harry would get upset, they would stay up all night and whisper beautiful secrets until they feel asleep in each others arms. Because in the morning it was always better.

 *

 Months passed and there was love, it was there all along really, hiding around corners and tucking itself into every crevice that was becoming their lives. It just hadn’t been spoken yet and that was okay, because it would.

 It finally raised its voice on Christmas Eve, which proved to be a very interesting night.

 “I love you. Did you know that?”

 Harry was always so blunt and Louis thought that was probably exactly what he needed.

 “I think I did actually.”

 He made Louis be honest and he probably needed that too.

 “Do you love me?”

 Harry asked, nuzzling against Louis' bare stomach where his head was currently resting, because he liked Louis' stomach.

 “You're big mess that you call hair is tickling me.”

 “You’re changing the subject Lou.”

 “M'not.”

 Louis was shaking his head because he was changing the subject and it was stupid and he just needed to fucking be a man and tell his boyfriend that he loved him too.

 “Yes I love you. I love you so fucking much and I’m not even a hundred percent sure why because your annoying and I don’t understand a thing that goes through your head and you snore like a dying animal. But  I think all that stuff is why I love you actually. Because you’re Harry, bank teller by day and cupcake maker by night. And I'm your Louis. I really love you.”

 Harry was blushing and that made Louis rather proud.

 “You’re adorable when your being all sentimental.”

 “Shut up.”

 But Louis was the one blushing now.

 “I know exactly how to shut you up. Don’t tempt me.”

 If that was the case Louis needed to start tempting.

 “You wouldn’t.”

 He licked his lips because that always seemed to get Harry's attention. It did.

 “I would.”

 Harry was staring, not blinking, maybe not breathing. Louis wasn’t sure.

 The only thing he knew at that moment was that Harry loved him and he loved Harry.

 And if they fucked on the bed and the couch and the living room floor, nobody else had to know, because it was Louis' apartment and he paid the fucking rent.

 *

 The next morning Louis' at the smoothie shop working, when the little bell on the door rings and in walks Harry. I mean he's dressed head to toe in all black and sporting a ski mask, but Louis would know his boyfriend anywhere.

 Neither say anything, Harry's hands clasped behind his back as he makes he way over to the counter.

 It's at that point Harry quickly pulls a water gun out from behind him and shoots Louis square in the middle of his face, cold water bouncing off his skin, little drops running down into the corners of his now beaming smile.

 “Can I help you sir?”

 Louis asks, in the most serious voice he can muster, his tongue darting out to lick the drops away.

 “I'm here to kidnap you actually.”

 And its so cheesy and stupid and _Harry,_ but Louis doesn’t really think his life belongs to himself anymore, (that demon did a really good job) so screw it.

 “You have to take the mask off.”

 Of course he takes it off and his curls look like he's been electrocuted  and his face is greasy from the heat but Louis still looks at him and thinks he's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. He's the most beautiful thing to ever find its way into his life.

 So when Harry jumps over the counter (because that is something Harry would do and it doesn’t surprise Louis anymore) and attaches himself to every inch of Louis' body, he finally feels like he's not a failure. And when they’re kissing like all the air in the world has disappeared and they need each other to breath (because they kind of do) he feels like robbing a bank was a good idea after all.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this was my first time ever writing any kind of smut so please don't hate me. also I'd love to know what you think because this whole thing just kind of was a spur of the moment oneshot that I wrote in less than two days which is quite an accomplishment for me. I'm kind of actually amazed this even came from my brain.


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